i am done rushing.

one of the most stressful things about living in america is everyone always being in a rush. amiright? if we aren't being proactive and figuring out our lives three years in advance, we're basically a societal failure. totally not true but you get my point. going a hundred miles a minute and always trying to act like we have it all together. ie. social media...  we make people think we are actually cool, but don't be fooled. it's a complete illusion. ok fine, it is for me at least (except i really do have cute dogs).

so, i am done rushing.

after i was accepted to the world race (and put down my deposit) for the first time in a very, very long time, i felt at complete peace. it has been a pretty rocky road this past year and i am glad it is over. after being unhappy with how things turned out, it has been a huge blessing seeing God provide in all aspects of my life. He has shown me how last year was needed for me to grow, be stretched, and to open my eyes to new opportunities - the world race.

i have less than five months left before i leave for the world race and the amount of things i need to do before then stresses me out, which leads to way too many panic attacks. there have been several moments this semester that i felt like i was at my wits end, leaning towards a major meltdown trying to get everything done in a timely manner and scheduling life up until i launch in august. and every single time, God shows up in His perfect timing. He has always been there and always will be. He give me rest and takes care of me. He is a good, good father.

and for fundraising, if someone would have told me a year ago i was going to have to raise $17,561 i would've told them they were crazy. even though i still get freaked out by that large number sometimes, the Lord has certainly hit my expectations out of the park. i am currently 58% funded! so, thank you to everyone who has supported me. i am so humbled by your generosity and willingness to help send me over to preach the good news. for those of you who would still like to donate, visit sarahcork.theworldrace.org. and for those of you who want to help support me by purchasing a t-shirt, click here (the order form closes on march 2nd). depending on demand, i may do another order form in this summer.

half the time, i don't believe i am actually going to be a missionary for eleventh months in a foreign land. side note, i'm fully aware i still don't know spanish. and honest hour, i have been listening to spanish for dummies whenever i am in the car. no shame. if all else fails and i don't get back my little conversational spanish i used to know, i'll just throw down a whole bunch of spanish vocab. 

after officially signing up for the world race, i began asking hannah (world race alum) the best way to prepare for training camp and my august departure. she said four words that became my new life motto - "finish this season well."

those words really stuck because i am known for always looking ahead. it's like my job. to always be worrying about the next step. trying to be ten steps ahead and never present. that's what is natural and honestly, what i'm good at. well... what i think i'm good at. i have recently learned that it makes it hard for me to enjoy the present, which is why i am done rushing.

i want to embrace the present. to make it a point to encourage, challenge, and pray for people. to be extremely intentional and be present in all aspects of my life. i want to enjoy the time i have left here in sodak. the ability to take classes (even when i despise them half... most of the time), to drink coffee and eat apples with peanut butter as much as i can, and to serve at church and the local homeless shelter - the warming shelter.

i recently ran across a blog that said, "when we look in Jesus' eyes, we find the one who fully knows us, and fully loves us." it's encouraging that Jesus sees us for who we are and knows us so well. He knows me and knows exactly how i need to change. so, my prayer for this season, as well as for the rest of my days, is to see the beauty in God's people and the joy in the little things. it is definitely not going to be easy some days, but it will be so worth it.

you can't change your past, but you can change your future. 

live, love, & lead <3